Aug18
Tuesday Thoughts…
It’s a run-of-the-mill Tuesday in mid-August here in Southern New Mexico. It’s h-o-t and we’re into the first week of school. Dreams of the Oregon coast are fading quickly, and it’s “back to reality.” Not to say I’m complaining – I have a job, a house, and a wild terrier-mix who greets me every evening at the door upon my arrival home.
Last night I puttered around putting the new memory foam pad on my bed and putting on my new “buttery soft” 400 thread-count satineen sheets. The Deepak Chopra meditation CD that I had ordered arrived in my mailbox today, and after this post I’ll listen to it under the glow of my Yankee lavender herb candle. However, I don’t know if Dr. Chopra would approve of my pre-meditation glass of red wine but what he doesn’t know won’t affect him…
Somehow I can’t seem to “catch up.” I’m amiss at commenting on blogs, returning e-mails, and thank you notes for blogging awards. I promise to catch up and “do better.” Even my WordPress dashboard is tugging at me saying: “WordPress 2.3.4 is available! Please update now.” However, I’m sad to say that the automatic update feature is a piece of crap, useless, wonky and I haven’t been able to update. Somehow, I’m just not up to contacting my blog host and trying to understand someone in Timbuktu speaking unrecognizable English to investigate the problem.
Bear with me, I have a lot on my mind (and on my plate) at the moment. I “blab” enough about my personal life (maybe a little too much) on this blog, and I won’t bore you all with the “gory” details. Don’t worry, I’m fine – I’m just on my “growing edge” at the moment.
Tonight I was clearing off some “clutter” when I came across a card. Upon closer inspection, I realized that it was an insert from a floral delivery when I had my second wrist surgery in April.
A big hug from ****. You are in my mind and all will be fine. Love, ****
At first I felt sad. How does love just “dissolve?” Why was I “lovable” then and/or when did I cease to be so? The truth of the matter is the words on the card were just that – words. It’s easy to say “I love you,” but difficult to love in the true sense of the word. Love is so much more than words – it’s caring, communication, dedication, respect, and at times sacrifice.   So, I didn’t have love – I just had “words.” The note is now disposed of, and the words are now just a faded memory.
The next time someone says “I love you” I’m going to say, “Don’t tell me – show me.” In that way, I’ll know if someone is just doing “lip service” or if I can trust the words.  Now you have my “growing edge/learning curve” for the evening.
Conversely, “love” is all around me – or at least loving thoughts.  Recent comments from “mysterious” Darrell have touched me deeply, and my friend Steven contacts me often – just to talk and see how I am. Also, my “posse” of frequent “blogging chicks” brighten my day. You know who you are and I’m so thankful for you all.
I may not have everything I want, but I have everything I need…
Yes. Show it. The word become flesh. It’s in the body, not in the words alone. I’ve recently been swimming in the love of old high school friends and the love of my family and we never talk the talk. We just love each other. I thrive on it.
“growing edge” and “show me” are good concepts…..it is wonderful how you are adjusting to being back at work…..that is a difficult passage….have a good rest of the week…..xoxoxo
For several years, I’ve learned to get by with only the things I need and not the things I want and since doing so, I’ve been able to have peace of mind. We all want this and that but do we need that! The man upstairs seems to know what I need and He always provides and so for now that’s enough for me.
One of the things you said is so true. It’s easy for many people to spout the words “I love you” at the drop of a hat. But it’s the little (and big) things that a person does that shows his/her love. Words are nice to hear, but meaningless without actions to back them up. It’s after the big burst of passion has subsided and life becomes mundane – taking out the garbage, paying bills, cleaning house, etc. – that you find out if the “love” is real and sustainable. I’ve been very lucky in this marriage. We’ve been together for almost 10 years and I still like him!! Sure couldn’t say that about the other two.
Like you, I’m a ‘show me’ type. Talk the talk but you’d better be able to walk the walk too.
I hope your back-to-school transition is going well.
“I may not have everything I want but I have everything I need”
Well said
I hope everything is well.
Damn straight, girl………keep ur head up!