Saturday * May 21st 2022

Hips Don’t Lie

3 Comments »Journal

Missing in Action – Chronic Pain Issues

It’s easier to vlog this than to blog:

3 Comments »Journal

Blogger and Comments…

blogging_platforms

Blogger Commenting…

OK, I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not the best at replying to posts on blogs.  However, with that said it’s now “virtually impossible” for me to reply to a comment when someone is using Blogger.  Something must have changed in the format.  Now the “option” for commenting is as follows:

Comment:  Google Account

Yes, I have a Google account at at the time I “try” to post a comment I’m signed in to my account.  Still, “no bueno.”

Yes, I’d Like to Leave a Comment…

I’ll admit I read a lot WITHOUT leaving a comment, but sometimes I’d like to “touch base.”

However, now I find it’s virtually impossible…

WordPress

Yes, for “form and functionality” WordPress is vastly superior.  I get that the price point of Blogger is minimal, but you pay for what you get.

3 Comments »Journal, WordPress

Doing the Right Thing…

rightthing

All of my life, I’ve struggled to do the “right thing…”

The older I become, I find that I instinctively know what the “right thing” is – at least for me.  I find that I’m able to weed out the false from true, and stand firmer in my beliefs.  However, this post isn’t about “right doing” on a global level – it has to do with care and concern for my family members.

I actually traveled from late December until last Monday.  I have to say that I met many wonderful people, and in some ways I “found my tribe.”  However, life goes on and in reality I have five brothers and a sister.  We’re not close, and I attribute that to losing my father after a five year illness when I was twelve.

Struggling…

Previously, I would “beat my head against the wall” to establish contact with my brothers and sister.  I got tired, and finally just gave up.  I talk to two of my brothers from time-to-time, but our lives rarely connect in any significant manner.  Still, they are my family and I can’t just “turn my back” on them.  I don’t communicate with my sister (the oldest) well, as she frequently likes to “try” and make me feel guilty.

Age and illness…

I’m in just enough contact to find out that my middle brother was hospitalized (and still recovering) from cellulitis in the Los Angeles area.  However, more pressing and serious was the diagnosis of my oldest brother with bladder cancer in Indianapolis. There are two siblings in the Indianapolis area to help, but no one seems to care.  I was shocked and upset to find that my brother who lives in an apartment has no bed.  Granted, he’s a poor financial planner and probably could have made it happen.  However, next Tuesday he starts chemotherapy and the thought of him being ill without a bed was incomprehensible to me.

Bed…

So, I contacted my brother and ordered the bed he wanted from IKEA and also contacted TaskRabbit to have it assembled.  I also contacted my siblings to see if anyone wanted to chip in on the cost.  Imagine the awkward chirping sound of ultimate silence.  So, I’m out approximately $700.  It’s really OK, and deep down I really didn’t expect any of the siblings to step up to the bat.

Sadness…

Still, it makes me sad that my other siblings (who are more financially affluent than me) chose not to help our brother in need.  Yes, I can afford the bed.  No, I really didn’t expect anyone to chip in.  However, I was hopeful that somehow our familial bond would cause them to do so.

The Right Thing to Do…

For me, I didn’t do anything extraordinary.  However, I just couldn’t let my brother battle cancer without a bed to rest in at night.  It was the right thing to do…

11 Comments »Journal, Pondering Life, Spirituality

I’m Still Here…

christmasChristmas Long Ago…

The Photo…

Christmas 1966 – my father had passed away in May after being ill for many years.  The expression on my face says it all – there’s no joy in Christmas for me.  It’s just something every year I “have to get through…”

Lately, I’ve been on “Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride…” 

It seems I have a major issue with age related teeth wear as well a being a significant night-time grinder (bruxism).  My previous dentist never told me about the issue, and while in Albuquerque at the International Balloon Fiesta I discovered I had a cracked molar by my face swelling and dental pain.  Since October 31st, I had a root canal and crown, a crack fixed in a neighboring tooth and another crown, a three-unit dental bridge replaced that was cemented improperly in Puerto Penasco, resin restorations done to several teeth to “strengthen” them, and of course a night-time dental guard. 

My “out-of-pocket” dental expenses with my basic dental plan have totaled almost $7,000.00.  I’m grateful that I had the money in savings, and wonder what people do that can’t afford proper dental treatment.  I sought out a new dentist, but have since found even another.  I’ve become increasingly sensitive about “Standard of Care” in the dental, medical, and vision departments.  My new(er) dentist was competent, but since he has a newborn infant turned off his “emergency” phone when the tot fell asleep.  It was the night that my temporary bridge fell out at 9:30 p.m., and I had no idea what to do.  Additionally, I’m no “wuss” in the pain department, but dental drilling without a numbing shot (“Hold on, I’m almost done) was unacceptable.

Trying to keep on top of my medical appointments, I went for an eye exam to a new optometrist.  I made a bad choice and he was mega busy.  I was there for two hours.  However, after he dilated my pupils and decided to take some retina photos/scans he told me I had Age Related Macular Degeneration (AMD).  He was hurried and matter-of-fact, told me to purchase special eye vitamins, and see him again in six months.

Needless to say, I went into a significant depression.  However, something told me that if I did indeed have AMD that I should be seen by an ophthalmologist.  The ones in Las Cruces were booked for months, but I got in to a doctor in El Paso.  It was the same drill – the technicians looked at my eyes and asked questions, and then I saw the doctor.  First he looked in my eyes and said, “Let’s take some pictures, but I don’t think you have AMD.”  He had the retinal scans printed out and saw me a few minutes later and said, “Here’s an early Christmas present for you – you don’t have AMD and your eyes look quite healthy for your age.

I started sobbing uncontrollably at that point. 

Trust…

I’ve learned a valuable lesson.  In terms of medical care, (especially in the aging adult) blind trust in any one person (doctor) is probably unwise. 

Moving On…

I’d be lying if I said all of this hasn’t taken a significant toll on me.  I now accept the fact that even to walk into a dentist office I now have to take a Xanax 1/2 hour before.  I’m “tired,” but want to “move on to a happy place.”  As many of you know that happy place for me is taking off in my RV and going to Puerto Penasco for the winter.  I’m trying to get my “mojo” up, but it’s tempting to stay at home where it’s safe and warm. 

However, I know that’s not good for me.  At home I converse with only my dog.  Having spent Thanksgiving alone, I have the same to look forward to for Christmas. 

That’s not “living,” that’s “existing.” 

Puerto Penasco isn’t perfect, but I do talk to people more, go out for Wednesday happy hour and Saturday breakfast.  I walk along the beach with Luna and let the sand and sea calm my soul.  I go once a week to Shooter Bingo where I’ve become the “appointed” popcorn popper – making popcorn for the bingo attendees (and having a shot or two of tequila). 

Where to Stay…

The campground I used to stay at (no hook-ups) is now $300.00/month and a site with full hook-ups is $498.00/month.  It’s worth it to me for the extra “creature comforts” to pay the extra money.  The dry camp place tends to draw some “crazy folk” at times, and I just don’t want to deal with that. 

I need to just go – my life is waiting for me…

5 Comments »Journal

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